Socially awkward?
by Gemma.A.S
Summary: Will Luc fianlly give into his temptations and show eddie how he feels? ...
1. Chapter 1

I've had this stuck in my head for ages, this is my first "leddie" piece and hopefully if you enjoy i shall write more.  
I apologise for any spelling mistakes.

Enjoy !

The cold air hit his face as he inhaled the fresh and pure air that can only be this refreshing from a height, he looked down and watched as the world went by, as car after car fastly made their way down the busy roads and as people got out of their cars to enter the hospital.

He had found that since he started at Holby, he had spent quite alot of his free time up here, when everything in there started to get too 'heated' or too 'personal' he'd escape up here, nobody would ask him questions, he could finally relax in his own company.

But that wasn't what he wanted, at least not anymore..

He no longer had the desire to be on his own, to get away from any form of human contact, he felt the exact opposite it, he craved her touch, the way she smiled at him when he'd given her a sarcastic answer, obviously his form of flirting, it was times like this where he hoped he wasn't so closed off with people, and that he didn't find it so hard to communicate and tell people how he felt, and most of all, listen.

Time had passed quicker than he thought, and before long he had arrived back to the ward 15 minutes late, much to Eddies annoyance.

...

"_Where've you been Luc? You can't just swon off whenever you feel like it_"

Luc looked at her and gave her a small smile, before responding sarcasticly.

"_Fishing_"

She gave him a look of confusion before walking off in the opposite direction.

Almost an hour had passed when Luc saw Eddie sat behind the nurses station obviously very intrigued in what she had on the computer screen, he saw this as his opportunity.

He casually walked over to her before quickly croutching down behind her with his head close to hers. She could feel his breath hitting the back of her neck giving her goosebumps.

She loved the way his muscular body stood out from his blue shirt, and the way as soon as he came near her, his pressence would suddenly make her feel safe and protected, and most of all, excited.

"_Anything interesting Nurse Mckee_" He whispered softly, making sure she noticed the change in the tone of his voice

"_Nothing you'd understand Mr hemmingway_" She tried her best to keep her desire in check, but it wasn't as easy as she thought.

He brushed his arm against her back as he slowly stood up before quietly saying,

"_Meet me in the lab in 5_" He walked off before she got the chance to question him.

She hated when he did that, when he left her hanging, she also hated the effect he had on her, how just the feel of his breath agaisnt her can get her so excited and leave her wanting so much more off him.

All she could do was comply, she couldn't concentrate knowing she had missed out on something, knowing that maybe, possibly he wanted her as much as she wanted him, as much as he infuriated her, she still wanted him and with the added bonus that he was sexy as hell.

He sat in the lab waiting for her, he knew she'd come, he knew she couldn't just ignore it, as much as she'd tried to, he liked the way she always jumped slightly when he touched her, and how he noticed the little hairs on the back of her neck stick up as his breath hit it.

The door opened ever so slightly, and eddi emerged looking flustered, almost as if she had ran there.

"_Ahh Nurse Mckee_"

"_What do you want Luc_" She exclaimed, slightly annoyed he'd broguht her here just to have one of his sarcastic conversations.

"_I need your help .._" He softly said, a hint of seduction in his voice.

"_With? .._ " She was getting extremly irritated now.

"_A little experiment of mine_"

_"Experiment? What am i? One of your little play things?" _She shouted whilst pointing to a dead rat he'd been experimenting on.

"_Firstly im assuming you're a woman? Unless you'd like to prove me wrong? If i am wrong im afraid the experiment will be abit more complicated, and secondly i don't recall every 'playing' with you' this is just something i'd like your help with"_ He said with the upmost confidence.

"_Can't you find someone else to asist you Mr Hemmingway_" She knew his game, she knew what he wanted now.

"_No, because if i asked somebody else, i wouldn't be able to do ... this .._."

He gently took hold of her wrists and pulled her closer to him,

"_Luc .._"

She focused her eyes on his, she could see the desire and excitment building up in him, and it's then when she realised that even if it was a tiny possiblilty, that he felt the same as her. He moved his head closer to hers as their noses brushed together and she placed her warm hands around his neck, bringing him closer to her, craving to feel his lips against hers, to show him how much she wanted him and needed him.

Before long, they were both getting lost in eachother, Luc had his hands on the skin of her hips, bringing her closer to him, needing to have proper human contact, she seductivly put her hands underneath his shirt, tracing up his body, knowing how excited this would make him, she could swear she heard him slightly moan.

Just as she started to unbutton his shirt, he reluctantly pulled his lips away from hers, hands still on her hips, he stared at her, her lips were swollen, her hair was all messy, but most of all, she looked beautiful.

"_This is why i needed you .. Nobody else_"

...

Eddie walked into work feeling strange, a strange sense of happiness, something she had failed to acomplish in life, despite her fierce nature. Butterflys appeared in her stomach as she entered AAU. Walking over to the nurses station, there Luc sat, fixing what seemed like a plastic helicopter, he looked up at her, his face kept straight, but that was nothing like what was going on inside him, his tummy doing flips as a weird sense on longing overcome him.

"_Good Morning Mr hemmingway"_ Eddie said with a small smirk

"_Is it Nurse Mckee_" He said questionably

"_Childhood toy?_" Eddi asked whilst looking towards the plastic toy he had so much concentration just moments before.

"_Actually, i bought it last week, took it for a spin last night and it seems to have demolished itself_"  
He said before standing up leaving Eddi to shake her head in disbelief.

She spent most of the day looking out for Luc, she couldn't help but think he was avoiding her, she'd seen glimses of him on the ward, but he didn't stop around to say one word to her. She couldn't help but miss his pressence, the way when she'd have to answer a difficult question from a patient before she had the chance to answer, he'd be behind her, his warm strong hand resting on the small of her back whilst butting in and answering it for her. How could she possibly be annoyed at him when he touched her in the most senstive ways. Even how he'd put his hand on her shoulder when things were getting to much, so she'd know he was there for her,

Complicated and cold, that's how everything saw him, his quick and witty responses to all questions fired at him made him seem socially awkward, avoiding all confrontation when necessary.

This was until he'd met someone who understood him, who had pushed and pushed until he'd finially open up, who hadn't given up and wasn't put off, or threatened by his awkward personality and strange sense of humour

It had gotton to 5 o clock and after a difficult case involving an alcoholic tragically passing away due to liver failure and with the added pressure of believeing she had done something wrong to luc to make him avoid her, she decided to sit in the locker room for a while, secretly hoping he would worry enough to come and find her.

Luc arrived back on the ward and immediatly noticed that something he had grown so acostumed to seeing was all of a sudden missing, so without hessitation, he went to where he knew she'd be hiding, she always went here when she was in a mood and the walk up to the roof seemed like too much effort to her. He made his way over to the locker room and gently opened the door, before procceding to enter, there she was, as expected. He closed the door behind him before he strolled over to Eddie, his overly shiny shoes squeaking as the soles hit the floor.

"_Eddie ... i thought i'd find you here_" Although he knew his pressence was known, she had not acknowledged him, so he thought he'd better speak up.

She slowly lifted her head, facing in the opposite direction to him, she couldn't look at him, all the anger she had towards him at that very moment would dissapear, and she needed answers first.

"_Really, why?_" She whispered quietly

"_I'm an expert in reading peoples minds_" He said as he crossed his arms across his chest

"_Pfft_" She sighed

"_What's the matter_" Luc said, ignoring her previous response

"_What do you think luc_" She asked him, needing him to acknowledge the fact that even after the previois night, he had returned to his usual self and put on his 'nothing happened' attitude

"_Hmmm, time of the month?_" He said light heartedly

"_Very funny luc, im not interested in your games anymore, im tired of it, i've tried and i've tried, but every time we get the tiniest but close, you push me away, you act like you don't care, so i need you to tell me .. tell me how you feel Luc"_ She was now facing him as he sat beside her.

He looked into her eyes, completely speechless, could he risk telling her how he felt only for her to reject him? Could he finally commit to someone other than himself and his work?

He took her hand in his and stroked the soft skin of her knuckles before quietly saying

"_I .. i .. it was more than a kiss eddi, it mean't more than just a kiss_"

"_What are you trying to say Luc? Don't start messing me about again, i've told you, no more games, ill ask to be moved wards if it is, ill leave ... i'll ..."_

She was cut off by his soft lips crashing against hers, he placed his hand on the side of her face as his other accomodated itself on the small of her back again, he knew how much she liked that, how much it'd would make her feel comfortable and safe, even though she'd never in a million years admit it.

He slowly pulled away, keeping his face a tiny distance away from hers, as he softly whispered

"_I think im in love with you_"

Please review !

Love Gemma xxx


	2. Chapter 2

Thankyou so much for your reviews, they honestly mean the world to me.  
I've tried as hard as possible to make sure there's no mistakes, as i don't have microsoft word, i've had to do it on wordpad, so i really am sorry if they're any mistakes.

Once again, thankyou to everyone and i really hope this chapter is up to all of your expectations :)

Enjoy ! :)

She slowly took a step back, her eyes drifted to the floor as she felt the adrenaline still pumping through her body. The man who had infuriated her so much, where he had even drawn her to the point of moving wards, the man who was the most emotionally detatched person she had ever had the displeasure of meeting, was in love with her? She couldn't deny that she'd fallen for him, but the thought of him hurting her was too much of a risk to take, she had tried so hard to be independant, and to not have to rely on other people to make her happy, she has a vague memory of something her mother told her "Eddi love, listen to your good old mum, you can never be happy with someone else unless you're happy with yourself" that had stuck with her for the past 10 years, and she'd never let anyone close enough to cause her any harm since. Luc's soft whisper brought her back from her little daydream.

"_Eddi .. wh .. what are you thinking? .."_ Luc looked at eddi, a sense of worry washed over him, he couldn't bare her rejecting him, he almost expected it though.

"_I can't do this Luc, i can't let you do this to me"_ Her voice shook as she spoke, if she let him in, she increased the risk of getting hurt, what if she gave him her everything and he trampled all over it and left her with nothing but a broken heart? Like all her other ex's.

"_I .. i ... don't understand?_ _i've just told you i love you and you're telling me i'm not aloud to? .._" He begun to get extremly aggrivated, wasn't this what she wanted? She'd given him the signals too, she'd flirted with him just as much as he did with her.

"_I didn't sa ._." She was cut off by Luc

"_You tell me to listen, so i listen, you tell me to talk so i talk, you even tell me to tell you how i feel so i do, what more can i do?_ " This was it, she'd finally cracked him, she'd got him to the point of no return, all he could do now was either continue to fight his corner, or eventually walk away.

Eddi looked up at him, tears threatening to fall from her eyes, he was right, he had done everything she'd asked of him, he had listened to the patients when she instructed him to do so, he had talked to her instead of closing off and leaving, and he'd just told her he loved her.  
Before she got the chance to fight her corner, Luc had exited the lab, shattered by her rejection.

"_Luc ! Luc come back ! ..._" She called after him, desperatly trying to explain herself, but he didn't listen.

He walked as fast as he could, he refused to stick around for her to tell him how she didn't feel the same or see her laugh in his face. Why would she kiss him back if she didn't want him? What need did she have to hesitate when he expressed his love for her? If she really wanted him that much, she'd admit it, not make excuses.

His shoes squeaked against the disinfected hospital floors as he quickly made his way out of the hospital, the cold air hit his face and it was only then when he realised Eddi was following him. He looked back and saw her quickly walking towards him, tears streaming down her face, her hair all messed up because of the typical english weather, but to him, she was beautiful.

"_Please stop ! please let me explain_" Eddi shouted.

He didn't stay to hear her excuses, or to hear her pleas, he needed to get away from the place that was no longer his '_Safe place_'

...

The moonlight shone through the roof of his caravan, it was way past midnight, he couldn't help but hope he'd listened to what she had to say, maybe she could of justified what she meant by 'i can't do this' almost like he was forcing her into something she didn't want, she mean't far too much to him to ever hurt her, he loved her for gods sake, the last thing he ever wanted to do was cause her any discomfort or upset.

He was brought back from his thoughts as he looked up and saw Eddi stood infront of him, obviously after letting herself in as usual.

"_You should start locking that door .. i .. i could of been anyone_" Her voice was already cracking, she tried as hard as she possibly could to keep her emotions in check, but everytime she was around him, he made her stomach do flips, she couldn't bare the thought of him hating her in any kind of way.

"_But you wasn't, and what kind of person would see a caravan and think 'oh i think ill go trespass on their premisis'_ .." Luc said calmy, almost like nothing had happened, he had put his barriers back up again.

"_Very funny Luc, i'm not here to argue"_ She was tired of his questioning and sarcastic remarks, she just wanted to explain herself, to make him understand.

"_Oh what a shame, i was looking forward to that"_ Still as calm as ever, he let his awkward nature take over in situations such as this.

_"Stop playing games Luc, i want to talk"_ Tears had once again began forming in her eyes, she couldn't take it anymore, she needed him to listen.

"_Talking's not really my strong point, as you're fully aware of"_ He could see she was upset, he felt guilty but he couldn't stop himself, he didn't want to get hurt, not again.

"_Please .._" She finally broke down ..

His eyes softened as he could see tears falling down her elligent face, he stood up and took two steps forward so he was directly infront of her, he placed his hands on her face, forcing her to look up at him, he gently wiped the tears away with his thumbs and gazed at her before whispering "_Please don't cry, please ..._"

"_I love you, you crazy woman"_ He exclaimed with a smile.

"_Oh so now you think i'm crazy?._." He always knew how to make her smile.

"_Well, since you're asking ..._" He was cut off by eddi.

"_Shut up and kiss me_" She said seductivly.

He pushed lips against hers and once again put his hands on her waist, bringing her as close to him as possible, tonight he needed her, he needed to show her how much she meant to him.

...

Hours later as the sun rose, Luc awoke first and smiled down at the woman laid against his chest, when he moved to Holby, he had never had the intention of meeting someone he felt so deeply for, he was glad that she was the one to finally break him.

It was only when Eddi started trailing her fingers up is chest did he realise she was awake, she looked at him and smiled before planting a kiss on his lips.

"_Morning_" she said her face inches from his, all she wanted to do was stay like this, with him, all day everyday.

"_Ahh morning Nurse Mckee"_ He said planting another kiss on her lips, before smiling contently, knowing he had wound her up.

"_Please stop calling me that, especially after we've just spent the night together"_ She exclaimed before placing her head back against his chest where she could hear his heartbeat throbbing fastly against her ear.

"_Oh i apologise, i was under the impression that was your name"_ He said with a smug grin on his face.

"_Shut it smart arse"_She pulled the covers back up before closing her eyes and savouring the moment.

...

Time had flown by quick and it was already the start of both of their shifts, they had come to the conclusion not to tell anyone about they're relationship, not that they had agreed to such a commitment, whatever they had going on, they preffered if nobody else knew, that way, they could have the private life they both desired.

It was just after dinner time when a heavily pregnant woman got admitted after going into labour, much to Eddi and Lucs dismay, but they couldn't get out of this one, they were stuck with her.

"_Can't you deal with this Luc? All the happy family and baby stuff makes me sick_"

"_Babies make you sick? There was me thinking you wanted one"_

"_Well do you want kids?_.." She said hopeful.

"_You mean do i want to create a human being who will eventually use up all the money i've worked so hard for,need constant feeding and changing, and take up the best years of my life? No"_

He walked off leaving eddi completely and utterly confused.

Luc delt with the delivery, whilst Eddi pretended to be '_bus_y' as pay back for him leaving her to deal with it last time, he looked around the ward to try and locate her, in which he failed to do so, she usually told him if she was leaving the ward for a while to help out somewhere else, but this time she hadn't said a word to him, and come to think of it, he hadn't seen his since the whole baby conversation.

He went to the staff room to make himself a coffee before begining his search for Eddi, as he walked in, he saw her sat on the sofa staring out of the window, obviously in deep thought.

"_Eddi_" He spoke softly whilst making his way towards her and wrapped his arms around her waist and placing his head on her shoulder.

"_What .. yeah" She replied tilting her head so she rested against his._

"_What's wrong_?" He said slightly concerned with her sudden change in mood.

"_Nothing .._" She felt stupid for even being upset, but she couldn't help it.

"_Come on tell me_" He pleaded with her, he wanted to help.

"_You'll probably think i'm being stupid .._" She turned in his arms to face him as their bodies were pushed against eachother.

"_I promise, i'll never think that, now come on, tell me"_He placed a hand on her chin and lifted it so she was looking at him in the eye.

"_Wh ... what you said before about you know ... babies and stuff, did you mean it? I'm not saying i want a family now or anything, but .. but i hoped in the future maybe .. bu_" He didn't give her chance to finish

"_Of course i want a family with you_" He smiled at her.

She crashed her lips against his and carelessly placed her arms around his neck, bringing him as close as humanly possible, even after they had spent the night together, and technically the whole day, she couldn't help but crave his touch and miss his strong arms around her.

She reluctantly pulled away before finally bringing herself to say what she knew he'd been wanting to hear for a long time.

"_I love you too, more than you'll ever know, please .. take me home_"

There we go ! Please review :)  
Lots of Love Gemma xxx


	3. Chapter 3

Thankyou so much for your amazing reviews, you're all amazing beautiful people and they all honestly mean a lot.  
I wasn't planning on updating this but i decided to carry it on since you're all so lovely.  
I hope this is okay for you.

Enjoy !

It had been almost a week since Eddi had finally admitted that she replicated Lucs feelings, that she too, was in love with him. The kind of love you imagine only in fairytales, just the thought of him loving her back just as much as she loved him brought her such unimaginable happiness. Happiness that she had stopped looking for many years ago, after coming to the conclusion that she'd never get to experience it, that she _'didn't deserve'_ it.

Luc's life had taken such an expected turn, he remembered how uncomfortable he felt about discussing his feelings and thoughts, and how he'd prefer to spend his nights alone in his 'mobile home' rather than spend it communicating with anyone. Things had slightly changed now, only slightly though, his overwhelming love for this woman scared the hell out of him, the thought of another human being wanting him as apposed to just needing him for a medical purpose was all new to him, and was one of the most frightening things he's ever experienced. What if he let her down? What if she needed him and he wasn't there? What if he needed her and she wasn't there? What if she stopped loving him? He tried his upmost best to push all the negative thoughts away, but the thought of leaving himself so open, so vulnerable, was a thought too dangerous to even comprehend.

It was a freezing September morning as Eddi made her way into holby, she had spent one of her few nights away from luc and she missed him like crazy, she looked down at her watch and saw her shift started in another half an hour, so did Lucs. Quickly, she walked to over to the caravan before letting herself in, and as predicted, Luc sat at his table going over patient notes.

He looked up and saw her, he could see the longing in her eyes, he too had missed her like crazy, he stood up and took a step forward,

"_**Morning"**_ He said softly giving her his famous half grin

"_**Morning to you too**_" She took afew steps forward and evoloped her arms around his neck, pulling him towards her, so his face was inches away from hers

He softly pressed his lips against hers, savouring the moment, yes, he had missed her, which was a feeling he had started to come accustomed to recently, everytime she had a late shift, or they were working different days, he always found himself at a loss with what to do.

She starting to quickly unbutton his shirt, her desires had defiantly taken over, she wanted him, here and now, and she was going to have him, well .. at least until he pulled away, which inevitably didn't take long.

"_**I thought sex made you sick**_" Luc whispered, remembering a conversation they had over three months ago, when his quick witt had irritated her and had caused her to make out sex and children made her sick

"_**Hmm .. im cured, its a miricle, besides, i think i can make an exception"** _She whispered seductivily and pushed her lips towards his again with force.

Once again, he pulled away.

"**_There's the slight problem of work Nurse Mckee_**"

"_**Argh**_" She groaned

She reluctantly pulled away and rested her head against his forehead ..

"**_I missed you Luc_**" She said softly

"**_I know, me too_**" Why couldn't he say the words? Why couldn't he tell her he missed her?

One last kiss and they made their way into AAU, obviously not together, they were trying their best to keep their 'relationship' a secret, was it a relationship? He didn't even know, relationship is such a big word, and a massive commitment, he wasn't the commiting type, like everyone knew.

It had got to lunch time without a hitch, no difficult patients, no arguments ... (Yet), Luc had been keeping his distance from Eddi, she knew they'd said they'd keep their relationship a secret, but completely ignoring her was a step too far, he was the once who had confessed his feelings too, he was also the one who said he wanted a family with her, so why was he acting so cold? so distant? So ... awkward?

She saw him disapear into the locker room, its strange how everyone goes in there when they need a minute to themselves, usually after a difficult case. She quickly followed him, as she entered, he was stood, staring out of the window, he looked troubled ... lost.

"**_Luc ..."_ **She said quietly.

"**_Mmmm"_** His response was barely loud enough to be heard.

"**_What's wrong"_** She was worried, worried she'd done something, worried he had changed his mind.

"_**What?"** _Now she had his attention, questioning, she always did that so well, always got an answer out of everyone so quickly.

_**"I said what's wrong**_" She was getting aggitated now, he never listened.

"**_Wrong? Why would there be something wrong_**?"

"**_You've been avoiding me all day, i've hardly got two words out of you_**" She sounded vulnerable ... scared.

"**_Well thats not true, i seem to remember our 'nearly' encounter when you broke into my home this morning_**" He could tell she wasn't in the mood for his sarcasam but he couldn't stop himself, it was like a reflex, everytime things got difficult, or too personal, his sarcastic and awkward side took over.

"**_Im not joking Luc_**"

"**_Neither am i_** .. "

She looked down at her hands, she could feel herself getting worked up, he thought this was a joke, he really didn't care did he? He didn't love her, not in the slightest.

"**_I'm sorry .."_ **He knew he had done wrong, he had ignored her on purpose, kind of, he didn't like the thought of something knowing him better than he knew himself, knowing everything about him, it made him feel so vulnerable.

"**_You didn't mean it did you_**?"

"**_Mean what?"_**

"**_When you said y .. you loved me, you've backed out, you're scared, i get it, but you can't mess me about Luc, you can't, i won't let you_**" The tears threatened to fall down now.

He looked at her, she was right, partly, he was scared, and all he wanted to do was get up and leave, but he loved her, too much to even think about leaving her.

He put his hands around her face and made sure she was looking at him.

"**_Hey .. hey .. you're wrong, you are wrong, i do love you, i do_**"

"**_You don't you rea_ **..." He kissed her, this was the only way he could prove it to her, the only way he could show her he loved her, because he sure as hell he couldn't put it into words.

He pulled away and wiped her tears away with his thumbs.

"I_** promise you, I love you, I love you so much**_"

Hours had gone past now, Luc had been paying alot more attention to eddi, well, at least until about an hour ago when he said he had to go finish some patient notes in his caravan, Eddi's shift ended in 10 minutes, she was counting down the minutes so they could finish what they had started this morning.

Luc sat in his _'home_' staring outside the window, he could no longer see holby, he was surrounded by fields and trees, no sign of life, no people, no cars, no nothing. Some people may call him a coward, but he called it _'looking after his sanity'_ he needed to make sure he didn't get hurt, but he had never expected to feel this guilty, one thing for sure was that he was most defiantly head over heels in love with Eddi, and now, he had to live with that every single day, he tried to convince himself it was for the best, for her, but deep down, he knew it wasn't.

Eddi quickly walked into the locker room to get changed, her phone beeped and she saw '_Luc_' flash on her screen, which put an unimaginable massive grin of her face, that was until she read what it said, she went over and over it, why did it seem like he had done something wrong? What did he do? Was he okay? She pressed call, nobody answered, she called at least another 5 times until the phone was switched off.

She ran outside in the rain, looking for what would make or break her entire future.

He had gone.

He'd left.

She looked at the message

"_I'm sorry_" and sunk to the floor, the water was splashing against her face, washing away everything, she'd lost him, he'd left.

I hope it was okay !

I'm really sorry if there was any mistakes, i tried my best, i do plan on updating this and i promise i won't leave it as long next time ! If any of you have twitter, mine if Gemma_Tones and i follow back !

Thankyou for reading and please review !

Lots of love Gemma xxx


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